Is Your Dog Truly Willing? Understanding Consent in Dog Training
Explore how luring, bribery, and real engagement shape a stronger training relationship.
Have you ever thought about whether your dog is truly choosing to participate in training, or just going along with it because they feel they have to?
It's a question that might make you pause. As force-free trainers, we talk a lot about being kind and using rewards, but there's something deeper to consider: are we actually giving our dogs genuine choice in their learning?
What Does Consent Look Like in Dog Training?
Real consent means your dog has genuine agency in the process. It's the difference between a dog who participates because they want to versus one who complies because they see no other option.
A dog who's truly consenting to training will:
Approach the training area eagerly when they see you setting up
Stay engaged even when treats aren't immediately visible
Show relaxed, forward body language
Offer behaviours without being prompted
Choose to stay when given the opportunity to leave
Compare that to a dog who reluctantly approaches, goes stiff when training starts, constantly looks away, or immediately walks off when the food disappears.
The Luring Question
Luring is one of our go-to techniques in positive training, and for good reason—it works beautifully for helping dogs succeed quickly. When we guide that treat to their nose and help them into a sit or down, we're setting them up to win.
But here's where it gets interesting: luring doesn't actually give dogs consent in the truest sense.
The dog is following the food, not making an independent choice about the behaviour. They're being guided through the motions rather than actively problem-solving or choosing to engage.
Does this make luring wrong? Absolutely not. Context is everything.
When Luring Actually Helps
For anxious or fearful dogs, luring can be a gentle bridge to building confidence. It provides structure and predictability that helps nervous dogs feel safe enough to engage.
This isn't so different from us humans, is it? Sometimes we need encouragement to try something that scares us, knowing the reward on the other side might be worth it. A friend might gently "lure" us into trying a new activity because they can see potential benefits we can't yet see ourselves.
Picture a rescue dog who's terrified of new experiences. Luring them onto a raised platform might help them discover that elevated surfaces aren't actually scary, building the confidence they need to make that choice independently later on.
But There Are Clear Limits
Here's what's crucial: you cannot and should not lure or bribe a dog into interactions with other dogs, people, or situations they have genuine phobias about.
This crosses the line from supportive guidance into coercion and can actually worsen fear and anxiety. True phobias and deep-seated fears require careful desensitization and counterconditioning—never forced proximity, even with the promise of treats.
Better Alternatives That Honour Choice
Shaping: Instead of showing the dog exactly what to do, shaping lets them experiment and discover behaviours on their own. When your dog offers even a small movement toward what you're looking for, you reward it. This builds confidence and creates active learners who love to engage their minds.
Environmental exploration: Rather than immediately asking for behaviours, give your dog time to investigate new objects or environments. Let them sniff, look, and approach at their own pace. You'll often find they become much more willing to interact once they've had a chance to gather information on their terms.
Wait and see: Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is simply wait. Put down a new toy or training prop and see what your dog does with it. Their natural curiosity often leads to behaviours we can capture and reward.
Let's Talk About Bribery
I have to use bribery any time I want or need my dog off the sofa (I don’t ask her to move all the time). She looks at me with that lazy expression that clearly says "what's it worth?" And honestly? I absolutely use bribery.
She's comfortable, I'm asking her to give up something she values, so it's only fair that I make it worth her while.
Think about it—we get up every morning to go to work because we get paid. That's essentially bribery, and we're fine with it because the exchange feels fair.
The key difference is context and fairness:
Bribing a fearful dog to approach something scary? That's problematic.
Offering your comfortable dog a treat to vacate your favourite chair? That's just good manners and respect for their autonomy.
Reading the Signs
How can you tell if your dog is truly choosing to participate in training versus just going through the motions?
Sometimes dogs try to tell us something even when they're attempting to comply. My dog understands "sit" perfectly, but years ago I discovered she won't sit on concrete. When I asked her to sit, she took a few steps backwards as if to sit but didn't actually do it. It took me asking her a few more times to realize she was trying to communicate that the concrete was uncomfortable. I've never asked her to sit on concrete since.
She was essentially saying "I want to do what you're asking, but this doesn't feel right to me."
Signs of genuine engagement:
Eager participation when they see training setup
Sustained focus even when treats aren't immediately visible
Relaxed body language—soft eyes, loose posture, natural breathing
Taking initiative and offering behaviours
Choosing to continue when given the option to stop
Signs consent might be lacking:
Reluctant approach to training areas
Stiff or tense body language
Frequent looking away or distraction
Immediate disengagement when food disappears
Trying to leave when given the opportunity
Attempting to comply but hesitating or modifying the behaviour (like my dog backing up instead of sitting)
The Bigger Picture
The goal isn't to eliminate luring or even bribery entirely—they're valuable tools when used thoughtfully. It's about being intentional with when and how we use them, always working toward giving our dogs more genuine choice and agency in their learning.
When we prioritize consent in training, we're not just teaching behaviours—we're building confident, thinking dogs who are genuine partners in the learning process. These dogs don't just comply; they participate. They don't just follow; they engage.
And that makes all the difference in creating a relationship built on mutual respect and trust.
Next time you're training, ask yourself: Is my dog choosing to be here, or do they feel they have no other option?
The answer might surprise you—and it could transform how you approach your training sessions.
What are your thoughts on consent in dog training? Have you noticed differences in your dog's engagement when they have more choice in the process? I'd love to hear about your experiences in the comments.